Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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