Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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