Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize