We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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