ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
