how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
