like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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