Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
