Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Randomize
