Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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