We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
