love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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