next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
