she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
