i don't like sucking hair
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
