Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize