Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
