how can u be prego again
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize