so let's talk penis.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
