I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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