I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
