i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
