I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
