i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
