I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize