It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
