This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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