Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
