Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
