you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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