Whatcha textin bout Willis?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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