and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
