Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
