Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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