Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
