TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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