i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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