I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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