3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
