Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
