p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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