i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
