"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
