doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
