Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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