but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
