Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize