We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
My balls are so social today.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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