Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
