Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize