wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
